Asian Men Don’t Send Flowers

I love flowers, rarely a week goes by that I don’t buy a little bunch for the kitchen bench, it brightens up my house and makes it feel more homey, I always take a bunch when invited to a friend’s house for dinner and I’m the first to send a little arrangement when a friend is sick or its somebody specials birthday, congrats on the new job! Congrats on the engagement – I’m always sending them!  but nothing is more special then when they are a gift from somebody, no matter if they are “I’m sorry I screwed up flowers” “It’s your birthday flowers” or “Just because flowers” you would have to be a cold hard bitch not to smile when receiving a bunch.




The thing is I have never had an Asian man buy me flowers, in fact I can’t remember the last Asian man I dated who didn’t express quite often how much of a waste of money he felt they were “they die in a few days” “they are so expensive” blah blah blah and then they would tell me it’s the thought that counts when buying gifts. So isn’t that a little hypocritical then? I mean if it’s the thought that counts surely a gorgeous bunch of flowers that will die in 3 days but makes me smile so hard my cheeks hurt is pretty damn thoughtful. Everyone knows flowers are so special because they are just one big thought that counts, we all know they die and we all know they are overpriced simply because they are tied with a pretty ribbon – THAT’S THE POINT!, it’s a big bunch of I think you’re special enough to spend time and money on you in the form of a gift that will die soon but look really lovely.

I’ve always been lucky enough to receive flowers from Caucasian men I have dated but when it comes to Asian men, I often find they are a little less romantic on the flower front.

So when “The flying Pho” suggested we celebrate our one month anniversary I was a little surprised. I’ve never had a guy suggest something so sentimental and he’s not exactly the mushy type, he continues to surprise me by taking me to lovely restaurants and personalising cards etc, we even celebrated our anniversary earlier as he would be flying with work on the actual day.

He bought me a thoughtful gift and we went back to the same place we had our first date, it was a great night and on the actual day of our anniversary I sent him a cute text to thank him for the past month.

Then he sent me back an email to pick up my virtual flowers…

Yes I know we can do all the thought that counts crap but come on … really?

Given the fact that he isn’t a time poor student living on the bread line, there is really no excuse to send virtual flowers. Don’t even start with the gold digger, money hungry comments because I know I’m not like that. I wasn’t expecting anything at all today considering we celebrated our anniversary early but virtual gifts haven’t been cool since 1999. It really only takes 10 minutes tops to send flowers, you don’t even have to spend time picking out the right bunch anymore, you can just click the seasons best button online and the florist will pick out the freshest flowers in stock, wack a pretty ribbon them and bam! Somebody is getting lucky tonight.

Sending a virtual gift not only signs the receipting up to some dodgy website with broken English and 3 dozen junk emails a day but it just screams I’m too cheap and lazy to send you real flowers so here is a blurry picture of some from the 90’s or worse some cartoon ones with flashing sparkles and elevator music in the background.

Attention all men, your special lady, white or not would rather get a thoughtful text message or email then a virtual gift if you can’t be there on the day and if you can, even a bunch from the grocery store or petrol station is better then, trust me.



20 thoughts on “Asian Men Don’t Send Flowers

  1. I think this is a thing you just need to get used to, I keep asking my husband to get me a flowers but the only one he got me in last few years was the one you can plant in the garden… You should see how proud he was telling me that ‘now you can keep them for longer’. Romantic. 🙂 Love your blog 🙂

  2. oh the practical flowers… I did once recieve a ring with a flower on it from “The One” with the same reasoning your husband gave you “it will last forever” lol it is romantic but dammit so is a bunch of roses! love your blog too, cant wait till the weekend when i have some spare time to have a really good look at it

  3. Buy yourself a nice, simple bouquet while out with your man and express genuinely and not over the top how fresh flowers make you feel. May take a couple tries before he catches on. If he doesn’t….well you may be out of luck in the fresh flowers dept. from him. Many dudes think flowers are a major production when they don’t need to be and you need to show him that. I’m an Asian dude and buy flowers; usually on a whim for gal pals, dates, etc.. just for the hell of it. The smile and appreciation the bring are priceless…..

  4. If my buy a gift for my special lady, I would hope she keep it, not throwing it away in a couple of days. Flowers is not a good option to show affections,in my opinion. I might buy flowers for a lover, but not for a significant other.

  5. NOT TRUE! My 2nd generation Asian (Vietnamese to be specific) husband bought me flowers quite a few times when we were first dating. My question is, what kinds of Asian men are you dating? Maybe they are not romantic, not serious about you, or they are not immersed enough into Australian culture to know to buy flowers. My hubby is 2nd generation, so he was immersed enough into American culture and knew that we like to get flowers. He also gave me chocolates. Smart man. So, I married him.

  6. The months before my fiance(chinese) and I left China he was so busy, and he got home really late because he had to finish some of his school work before leaving. Eventually I became pretty frustrated and he figured the best way to make me happy again was to buy me flowers and a teddy bear 🙂 haha.

    great post, great blog 🙂

  7. I must be terribly unromantic then. 😛

    I was born and raised in Australia so I understand the concept and I quite like flowers myself, but I don’t agree with the concept of sending bouquets. I see it as a pointless gift, the flowers wilt and die off, you end up having to throw away the whole bunch in a couple of days. Why isn’t a potted flower shrub or indeed, a flower garden that (with enough care given) blooms year after year considered a more romantic gift?

    I guess, that it’d be a bit much early on in a relationship or just for casual dating. 😛 I don’t know, surely there’s a better way for showing one’s interest and affection?

    • I understand your logic but thats the point, its the ultimate “thought that counts gift” , women are emotional, men are practical – its kinda like how men will never get what a nice hotel room can do for a woman.

      • I understand perfectly, I just have a fundamental disagreement with the whole sentiment or concept. Which is why I will probably be forever alone. 😛

        I don’t know about other men, but in my case, my reasoning is more based on emotional attachment than practicality. I grew up around flowers, mum and grandma kept flower gardens. It simply makes me sad seeing them wilt away and die.

  8. LOL I finally got flowers from a Taiwanese boy, but my ex– Korean, never bought me any despite all the shit that you might see in those addicting Korean dramas and shows.

    Nevertheless, he gave me his credit card and bought me plenty of other things– like food, liquor, and Betsey Johnson dresses, so I never complained!^^ To each their own~

  9. I send my wife flowers all the time. Of course, all the usual dates, Valentine’s Day birthday, anniversary, or just because… I know that flowers will bring a smile to her face and thinking about her smiling makes me do the same even when no one is around. I normally send flowers to her office or carry them home after work. So what if the flowers die in a week or two. She got to enjoy them during that time. There are things about love that are not practical or logical, or we all would be bored to pieces. Why go out for a $150 dinner on her birthday when you can throw a couple steaks on the grill and a bottle of wine for a fraction of the cost? Because she is special! Now my wife is pregnant with our first child and I can add Mother’s Day as another day to send flowers.

  10. I just started browsing all the “AM/WW” blogs out there (I’m delighted there is even a handful!!) and I just came across yours. I’m a bit taken aback that you would say “Asian men don’t send flowers”??? I live in China with my husband and flowers are a BIG thing here (fresh, dried, made entirely of stuffed animals, single died roses dipped in glitter, and so on). I constantly see women walking with their sweethearts holding BIG huge bouquets of flowers that they just received… especially on the holidays! It’s even a *thing* here to give 11 roses because it signifies “1+1”. Flower shops are literally everywhere and the guys definitely use them. Plus, my Chinese hubby gets me bouquets, bonsai, and plants quite often! 🙂 So, I think that’s not a very fair or true statement.

    I do know there are many men who don’t *get* the idea behind giving flowers. But, I don’t agree with it being a race thing. China alone proves that. Actually, I see more flower giving here than I did back in America.

    Might I also suggest just telling your man you like to receive flowers? Some guys just need a hint. When I let my husband know I enjoyed flowers he took it and ran with it! 🙂


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